you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
you never realize your highschool teachers are real people till you fuck one of them
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize