im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize
