in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Sorry I was drunk and left blood all over your back seat I was pretending to be in private Rayan and used your thong as a bandage
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
He came over hammered at four in the morning with roses trying to get me back when my new fling opened the door he just stood there crying for 40mins even after we closed the door
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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