Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I fucking love your mom. She's so drunk and fully functional. I aspire to be her one day.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
Randomize
