wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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