I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
vagina is talking i cant
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
I thought we were but then I freaked myself out. So I kind of geared him up for take off and then cancelled the launch
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Randomize
