I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I will pee on everything he values.
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
