see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
