When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
When i sexted him a pic of my boobs I was worried he was going to notice the dorito crumbs and know I was just eating topless
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
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