You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
