either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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