So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
