hell yes lets make some ravioli
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
So they just told me that while I was being loaded into the ambulance the cop told them if they were good friends they'd post it on Facebook...
The subtweets were good enough
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
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