I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Randomize
