I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Randomize