So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Randomize
