you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
Randomize
