I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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