i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
I just wanted to check in on you and you replied with a selfie with your Coney Island waiter and the caption "after his shift we're dropping acid together"
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Randomize
