I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Some ambulance just rolled up to this bar and this girl just hops out of the back and walks inside
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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