Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
Boobs are out for the taking
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Randomize
