their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Giving my coworkers lap dances cuz it was my turn to decide our team bonding exercise. Go happy hour!
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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