i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
She barfed in the corner of the baby pool. Then she yelled "it's okay" repeatedly while trying to scoop it out.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize