Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
