She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
she told me i tasted like america
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
