Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
