I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I just counted my steps so I know when you start looking for you on my way back from the bathroom
You know how us drunks love counting steps
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
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