I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I NEED HELP. IM TRIPPIN BAWLS IN THE BACK OF MY MOMS CAR.
Randomize