do you know why "how to shave your balls" is bookmarked on my computer?
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Randomize
