im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Randomize
