OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
