oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
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