i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
Randomize
