i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
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