Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
