Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
It's like the blind leading the senile over here.
UPDATE: shit just got real- grandma is threatening to beat grandpa with a wooden spoon covered in chili.
There are panties and mini bottles of Fireball in my purse. Except for the broken toe incident, I'd say last night was probably a success.
I AM VODKA MAN
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize
