Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
The beer is more important than you right now.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
Also, being stuck with my family all week has made it very clear that I need to be drunk and I need to be fucked pronto
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
