it wasn't lemon gatorade
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
When you see a guy in a wheelchair try to be cool and pop a wheelie, and then fall over backward and hit his head, is it funny or sad?
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
