My parents took my cat for a ride in the car. Second weekend in a row. They think its fun. Dear God
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize