I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
