yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I managed to convince my mom that my hickey was a birth mark I have always had. She cried for an hour about being a terrible mother for never noticing it.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
It’s bad enough my brother slept with half of the sorority this year, but now he’s lifeguarding at the club and every divorcée and cougar in town is asking me for his number. My twin is a manwhore and I’ve become his pimp.
Randomize
