Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
I'm definitely drunk. At the gyno. On my birthday. Life is a joooooooke
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
