remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
No. Cease was criminally insane from birthday shots, and not a lot of women want to go home from the bar with a guy who wants to "snuggle but keep it strictly professional".
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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