A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize
