i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
