The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
I may or may not be wearing slippers and a TMNT hat. This thing better not have a dress code.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Randomize
