I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I wish the guy in the stall next to me would stop moaning while taking a dump.
I wish you'd stop texting me from the toilet.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
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