i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Randomize
