Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
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