just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
If you send me another picture of a donut on your penis while I'm at work, I may have to slap you With the donut.
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