East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Apparently drunk me thought it was time for a career change. I woke up with a message from Mcdonalds saying that I was hired as the new cashier.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
Randomize
